Saturday, February 23, 2008

Simple Ways to Effectively Control Your Anger

Strong emotions like anger can affect your physical well being. Because of anger, you may experience chest pains, upset stomach, heart palpitations, difficulty in breathing, dizziness, high blood pressure, and other health problems (I did). Because of these, you need to find ways to effectively control your anger.

There are ways to deal with anger and here are some of the effective ways:

Determine the source and cause of anger. A strong emotion has to be resolved first. Unresolved anger escalates, and bitterness will show in your interaction with other people. Diffuse anger and it will relieve the stress in your system.

Talk to a friend. One of the best approaches to manage anger is to talk and confide to others. You may talk to a friend, counselor, or selected group with a common purpose to help each other. Talking to somebody about the feelings you have in your heart relieves tension. It is like unloading a heavy burden. It is not necessary that an advice be given. Just lending a listening ear is enough. Advice may be given if it is sought. It opens your mind to new ideas and perspectives that you may not have thought of due to the anger you have within.

In a group therapy, other people can help you. In the process, you can also help them when it is their turn to talk, and it is your turn to listen and show concern. A listening ear helps dissipate the amber of anger. At the same time, it rekindles gentleness in the heart.

Learn to forgive. By far, this is the best way for me to relieve anger. Forgiving may take a lot of effort. You may find it difficult to forget the hurt and anguish you went through. It takes a lot of convincing on your part, but it can be done. Forgiving releases you from the power other people have over you.

One technique my friend often use is the angry letter technique. Write a letter to the person who has caused you anguish and pain. Write in detail what he did and its effects on you. Feel the pain and anguish as you are doing the letter. In the end, write “I forgive you for all the pain you caused me. I wish you well.” Burn this letter and feel the release of negative emotions.

My own method to forgive is by logic reasoning. I will talk to the person who specifically make me angry or hurt my feeling directly. I'll be honest and share what I feel towards that person, because sometimes one do not know what he/she has done wrong. For me, trying to figure out why that person did such things can make me understand the situation from another point of view beside my own. 90% of the times, it's just a misuderstanding that could have cost us priceless friendship if go unsolved.

If you care about your physical well being, learn to control your anger. Try these simple steps and enjoy a healthy life!

Live your dream!

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